A sage piece of advice is never trust anyone who seeks power. While I have never sought temporal authority, knowing the grave responsibilities and moral risks involved, a number of citizens of these United States recently acclaimed me emperor.
Not having the heart to let my fellow Americans down, I conditionally accept their imperial nomination.
Here is my tentative imperial platform, which I will enact upon ascending the throne, for the common good of my subjects:
Congress and the judiciary suspended
As Trump showed, the custodial state will stoop to any underhanded trick to foil a reformist executive’s agenda. Luckily, the groundwork for making an end run around their machinations was laid decades ago.
The United States’ Continuity of Government plan originally laid out the succession of power in case the president were to be incapacitated. Franklin D. Roosevelt greatly expanded the scope of COG, and the last needed touches were added by Reagen-era executive orders.
Under the expanded COG provisions, I would cite the current Covid disaster to invoke COG emergency powers. Specifically, I would use these powers to dissolve Congress and the judiciary for the duration. Unfettered by partisan stonewalling and activist judges, the rest of my agenda would be easy to implement.
The One, Holy, Catholic, and Apostolic Church established as the official religion
Bringing a knife to a gunfight is a tactical error. The Death Cult’s supposed opposition has been making this error repeatedly for a century. Whether it is incorrigible conditioning or deliberate sabotage is now moot. The Cult is not motivated by 19th century economic theory. It is driven by a twisted moral vision.
The only way to defeat a moral vision is with a superior moral vision. The Taliban of all people gave the decadent West a demonstration of this principle when their erroneous yet still superior moral vision set the Cult to rout.
To break the Death Cult’s social dominance here and keep them from regaining a foothold, we need a superior, unified moral vision. That means establishing a national religion, as Poland has done. To that end, I will establish the Catholic Church as America’s official faith.
This decision will surely give rise to much controversy. That’s fine. One of the chief benefits of monarchy is that the sovereign may stand unmoved by fits of mob pique.
More practically speaking, the Catholic Church, for all her members’ faults, is the only sound foundation upon which to build a successful reaction against the Woke Cult. She has withstood every heresy and pogrom which sought to destroy her before. She is also the largest Church in America, with the next largest Protestant denomination enjoying less than a third of her membership.
In the all-important matter of moral vision, in Western Christendom, only the Catholic Church has stood firm against artificial contraception, sodomy, female clergy, and every other strain of witchery. Yes, her hierarchy is now rife with corruption. That corruption sprang from the Church stooping to feed from the government trough. As emperor, I will mandate that Catholic schools and charities adhere to the Church’s own catechism and code of canon law in order to receive federal funds.
100% tax on all wealth over $100 million
Hat tip to Roosh V and Devon Stack on this one. If you follow the money trail from custodial state street enforcers like BLM and Antifa, it leads to Cultist billionaires. On the culture front, no-talent woke hacks receive cushy sinecures at the major entertainment companies bankrolled by the same old money class.
Runaway generational wealth has driven much of the Death Cult’s revolution. The reason dissenters have been unable to “build your own” parallel institutions is because plucky startups with crowdfunders are comically outmuscled by families whose vast fortunes go back 400 years. It’s not the tortoise and the hare. It’s the tortoise trying beat a hare with a 400 mile head start and a rocket pack.
It’s not like I’d go full Marxist wealth redistribution. $100 million is more money than you, your children, or your great-grandchildren could ever spend. If you can earn that sum fairly and honestly, congratulations; enjoy! But every cent in cash, financial instruments, and assets beyond that figure will be confiscated. No more billionaires warping the government and culture to their outlandish ends.
Full debt jubilee declared and usury outlawed
Another moral imperative that has stirred up controversy on this blog is ending the student loan crisis. After having extensively researched the problem and discussed solutions with my readership at length, my conclusion is that no sane society can allow the debt crisis to continue.
That is why, upon my coronation, I will declare a jubilee year for all American subjects and all victims of American companies’ usurious practices. All usurious debts, including student loans and recourse mortgages, car loans, and credit card debt, will be wiped out. Following the cleaning of the slate, usury–that is, charging interest on recourse loans–will be outlawed.
Now, I could make an economic argument about a debt jubilee unleashing the spending power of debt-shackled Millennials, but that’s just a side-effect. The point is that usury is immoral, the fault lies solely with the lender, and no just society should tolerate it.
University endowments seized and public education dismantled
Modern universities are nothing more than Death Cult seminaries. As punishment for inculcating the youth with lies, their endowments will be seized. That fact that we’ll be able to pay off the student loan jubilee with the proceeds is just gravy.
But the brainwashing starts much earlier than college. That’s why abolishing compulsory public education is at the forefront of my education reforms. Prussian-style mandatory schooling by arbitrary age and time delineations is obsolete. We have no need to train all children for futures in 19th century factories or second generation warfare. As emperor, I will relinquish the state’s role in raising our children and restore that right and duty to parents.
Anti-family policies ended, family formation encouraged
A key tactic in the Death Cult’s revolution has been their relentless campaign to destroy the family. Putting a stop to these abominations will be a top priority throughout my reign.
Specific pro-family policies will include:
- Legally defining marriage as matrimony
- Legally defining abortion as infanticide
- Outlawing the sale, shipping, production, and purchase of artificial contraceptives
- Granting every heritage American married couple a cumulative 20% income tax break for every child
National defense powers used to defend the actual nation
Under my reign, the neocon and globalist farce of invade the world, invite the world will cease. The following measures will be thoroughly and swiftly enacted:
- All land and sea borders between the United States and other countries closed.
- All American military forces currently deployed overseas redeployed to defend those borders
- The above to include rounding up, detaining, and deporting all foreign nationals in the country illegally
- Birthright citizenship ended
- Full immigration moratorium until such time as pre-1965 demographics are restored.
Of course, legal and economic action alone will not suffice. Both are downstream from culture. To foster American culture’s rehabilitation, I will implement the following …
All trusts busted
Including, but not limited to, the Big Tech monopolies. Any corporation found to be engaged in monopolistic practices, cartel activity, collusion to stifle competition or censor customers, etc. will be broken up into separate companies with no more than $100 million in total assets. Any other company worth over $1oo million will have the excess seized. No more trusts.
The arts funded
One benefit of having an emperor who is also a writer will be the end of Conservative blindness regarding the arts. I will lavish monies confiscated from Woke Cult outfits on artists who seek to serve the Truth and Beauty in the service of their customers.
No more will pink-haired propagandists fail upward from one iron rice bowl gig to the next. Instead, creators offering not woke sermons, but honest fun, will receive generous grants, six-figure stipends, and million-dollar contracts to pursue their art for God’s glory.
Glow-in-the-dark spying apparatus retained
It’s an open secret that the alphabet soup agencies are spying on all communications between everyone. Full disclosure: I’m not getting rid of the glowie panopticon as emperor. Instead, I will use it with dry eye, cold blood, and iron fist to expose and punish the satanic pedos that populated the deposed order.
These steps should get us off to a good start, but as our Cultist friends are keen to remind us, there’s always much more work to be done.
The work begins when you stop paying people who hate you and start supporting artists who entertain you.
